Small People

Small People

Thursday, June 19, 2014

Signs You Might Be an Over-Involved Parent

Are you an over-involved parent? A helicopter mom/dad? Am I? Do I have the traits that would characterize me as one? Can you be too involved in your child's life? These are the thoughts going through my head.

This week Sassy went to an activities camp at the local university. For 4 hours each morning, the campers participate in four activities - kickball, soccer, basketball, and swimming. This has been perfect for my little athlete. This is the first year that Sassy has gone to a day camp without one of her sisters with her, so I worried about how she would do that first day. Boy, was I in for a surprise! After she was checked in, she walked away from me and over to the other campers without even saying good-bye. I think dropping her off was harder for me than for her.

That got me thinking about that term I hear quite often - Helicopter Parent. You know the one hovering over their child trying to live that child's live with (for) them. Yes, the thought had crossed my mind to stay for a while and make sure Sassy was doing okay, but I knew that she would be fine without me. I knew I didn't want to be that over-involved mama.

Here are some signs you might be an over-involved parent:

  • You do more of your child's homework or school projects than your child does. If your afternoons and evenings involve math problems and science projects while your child rides his bike, you might be over-involved.
  • You choose your child's clothing for them. If you are picking out what your 16 year old will wear to school each day, you might be over-involved. 
  • You choose your child's friends for them. If your small person's friends had to fill out an application to be approved by you, you might be over-involved.
  • You think of yourself as a part of your child's sports team. If you've ever been in a fight at a youth sporting event (as an ADULT), you might be over-involved.
Note: All of this is said tongue-in-cheek. I mean no offense to anyone, and this is in no way based on anyone I know in "real life." However, if you find yourself offended, you might be over-involved. :)

Image from freedigitalphotos/David Castillo Dominici
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